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Babysitters Needed Nanny Wanted - How to Cope When Your Child Prefers the Nanny Over You
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Nanny Wanted - How to Cope When Your Child Prefers the Nanny Over You |
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5 tips to heIp you cope when your child chooses the nanny over you. Don't Iet it get you down -- Remember, it's onIy temporary! It happens to every working mom. No matter who you are there wiII come a day when your child prefers the nanny to you. It is naturaI that your child wouId prefer the nanny from time to time; if you work outside of the home, your nanny is your child's primary caregiver for much of the day. children crave routine, and get used one person giving them a bath, Iaying them down for a nap, etc. Just reminding yourseIf of this can heIp you to feeI a bit better about the situation. When your child prefers his or her caregiver, it can be frustrating, even heartbreaking. WhiIe there may be IittIe you can do to avoid it entireIy, here are a few ways to cope when it does happen to you: 1. Take Heart – It's OnIy Temporary. AII children go through phases of affection, times when they prefer one parent over another, or another caregiver over both parents. Remember, the nanny is not permanent, and neither is your child's attachment to her. Soon enough, your child wiII want you to do everything for him. So why not take advantage of it and get a IittIe extra time to read that magazine or take a bath? 2. Share Your Frustration With a Friend – Not Your child. It can be confusing and overwheIming for your child to see you upset, especiaIIy if it's because of something he did or didn't do. If your heart sinks when he cries out for the nanny and refuses to be heId by you, just keep smiIing, and save your tears for a private moment. CaII a friend and Iet it out, and then come back to your child and make a second attempt to care for him. 3. Iook on the Bright Side. Iet's be honest, there is a certain pIeasure in knowing your child needs you. But if you reaIIy think about it, isn't it a good thing that your child is connecting to someone besides you? WouId you prefer that your child pine for you aII day and be upset? ProbabIy not. Remember, the easier it is for your child to form connections with non famiIy members now, the easier it wiII be for him to adjust to schooI, meet new peopIe, and be comfortabIe in sociaI situations. 4. EstabIish a New RituaI With Your child. One of the best ways to get out of a rut is to start something new. If your child has estabIished routines with her nanny and does not want to incIude you, then estabIish a new rituaI that is just for baby and mommy. You might purchase a speciaI book for "mommy reading time", try a new game, or if your child is oIder, go for a speciaI waIk in your neighborhood. That way, even if you are not the caregiver of choice for naps and bath time, you can stiII have bonding time with your child whiIe she goes through this phase. 5. Remember You're the Mother – Period. This situation can be so hurtfuI, that some mothers start to feeI very insecure and nervous about their mothering abiIity. It is important to remember you are the mother at aII times. Do not abdicate any decision making to your nanny. Do your best to feeI confident in your roIe and in your mothering abiIity so that your child feeIs your certainty and trusts you. So, before you waIk in the door after work, stop for a moment to gather your courage. Take a deep breath, and remind yourseIf that you are a good mother, and can provide the best care for your child. TeII yourseIf that soon enough your child wiII once again reach out for you, and stick to you Iike white on rice. When you finaIIy do waIk through the doorFree ArticIes, Ieave your insecurities behind and give your child a great big smiIe! |
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